Are you a victim of your past—or a product of your past?

Everyone has a past. Some people can’t help but live in that past. They are victims of their past. Others can have a different perspective. They use their past as a tool to drive them forward. They use the lessons learned in their past to create a better future. They are not victims of their past. They are products of their past. Which are you? If you are a victim of your past then your future is set. You will keep doing what you have always done and will have to accept the consequences of those actions. On the flip side, if you are a product of your past then you can take the lessons of your past and shape the future.

What is it like being a victim of our past?

Being a victim means being unable to take responsibility and ownership to the things happening around them, whether it is poor health, poor relationship, poor finances, poor social skills. They just blame their past for whatever their situation in the present is.

Here’s an example of the thought pattern of someone who lives in the past.

“I was bullied”,  “It’s ok for me to be alone”, “I don’t want to participate in society anymore”, “I don’t want this to happen again so I will seclude myself”.

They brought this thought pattern to the present.

“I was bullied before, you cannot treat me that way or you will trigger my traumas”, “I was bullied before, you cannot force me to interact with others.”

I was that person before several years back.

However I despised myself thinking that way. Instead of asking for special treatment from others, I could’ve worked on making peace on my past so people wouldn’t have to work around me.

I kept using that as an excuse.

There is no doubt that our past experiences shape who we are today. However, how we perceive those experiences will directly influence how we feel today and how we make decisions.

There are people who are strongly victims by their past, they are those who keeps blaming the world for what has happened to them. Blaming the world, or the situation, or others is easier compared to taking responsibility.

There would be people who would rather say…

“How am I responsible if this wasn’t my fault?”. But you are.

You are solely responsible for whatever is happening in your life. When you blame the world, you’re subconsciously telling yourself that it’s a problem that you can’t change.

But would you rather keep on blaming your past, blaming all the shitty things that happened to you? Are you gonna keep using your worst experiences as an excuse of being a poor version of yourself? Or would you rather use that experience as a foundation for your character? For your own betterment?

How to be a product of your past?

I always hated it when people told me: “You’re where you’re at because of all the choices you’ve made in your life” — because I didn’t like the implication, and I don’t think it’s always true. Traumas didn’t really make us stronger, rather traumas forced us to get over it. It’s tough to be a victim of our circumstances. It’s even tougher to be the product of your past. It means to be tough to yourself, it means taking responsibility. It means taking ownership.

Life is tough why shouldn’t you be?

We may not be able to change our past, but we can control how we let it affect us. We can choose to let our past experiences empower us, rather than hold us back. We can use them as motivation to become the best versions of ourselves.

Rather than being a victim who feels that they don’t have any control over their present or future. Be someone who can realize on why and how they are where they are at. Be someone who can find out what action to take for their current situation. But this can only happen when you accept responsibility for whatever is happening for your life.

Being a product of our past means we can choose to use our experiences and decisions to move us into our future. It’s important that we take the time to understand our past so we can truly create decisions to do things that is really important for us. Knowing the bad and good things that happened in your past is important because it helps you make better decisions in the present.

Conclusion

How we perceive our past has a huge impact on our present. Some people think that because of their past, they have no control over their future. We often let our past dictate our present. But are you a victim? We can choose not to be a victim. We can choose to be a product of our past.